The Fat Lady Sings

The Handmaid’s Tale

I’ve blogged about this before. It seems women are now considered disposable in America. Two distinct cases, two similar outcomes.  I’m sure that many of you have heard by now about the young woman who was brutally raped in Tampa, Florida. She went to the police to report the crime – and to beg for help. When the Tampa police ran her name – they came up with an old warrant (from when she was in High School, actually) claiming she hadn’t paid restitution for a shoplifting charge.  What did they do?  Put her in jail for two days.  Oh – they had already taken her to the hospital where it was confirmed she had been beaten and raped.  The doctors there gave her the morning after pill to ensure a pregnancy didn’t occur as a direct result from the rape.  While in jail – she was denied that medication.  The matron in charge claimed the morning after pill was ‘against her religious convictions’, and refused to let this poor rape victim have her legally prescribed medication.  Hell – she was only released from jail because her lawyer went to the media.  That warrant she was jailed on?  Bogus.  The woman had taken care of it as a teenager.  It hadn’t been accurately removed from the system.  Oh – and now she’s pregnant by her rapist – thanks to some religious nutcase who thought it was perfectly all right to promote her own agenda under the aegis of the state.  I guess Florida’s a theocracy now. 

Case number two:  A woman trying to get to the hospital to prevent an already occurring miscarriage was denied medical attention and thrown in jail on a traffic offence.  A traffic offense!  While behind bars - she continued hemorrhaging until giving premature birth to a four month old fetus that lived approximately one minute before dying. There is video tape of the victim pleading with officers for medical assistance and being denied:

A police videotape released Tuesday shows Sofia Salva telling officers numerous times last Feb. 5 that she was pregnant, bleeding and needed to go to a hospital.

After the ninth request, the tape shows, a female officer asked: “How is that my problem?”

How was that her problem? My god.  Cold, callus, heartless - I don't know where to begin.  And guess what?  The victim here was black.  Black and female.  That’s all it takes in America to be brutalized by the police.  I’m surprised they didn’t just shoot her dead in the street. You know - I don’t recognize this country anymore.  We have become that which I was always taught to despise. We are the Soviet Union at the height of its paranoia. We are Germany in 1939.  We have lost whatever imperator granted by virtue of our Constitution. I have wept my last tear over this.  America is dead.  The neocon religio-fascist cabal murdered her six years ago. 

**Animation courtesy of The Tennessee Guerilla Women

Blog for Choice Day

When I think of choice – I think of much more than reproductive rights.  I think of women’s rights in general; about how they are abridged, crushed and flattened - especially lately.  If you had told me thirty years ago that women in America would still be fighting to retain personal control over their bodies I’d have told you to go get bent.  Yet we are.  Right here in America.  In fact - I just read that in North Dakota - a man and woman living together sans marriage certificate is actually considered a sex crime.  That’s what I said – sex crime.  I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised – women are considered a crime unto themselves in that medieval backwater of a state.  You think I’m shitting you – but I’m not. Those bozos are actually prosecuting people for this.  Really.  Some brilliant-ass D.A. up amongst the bison is wasting good money and the courts time labeling co-habitation as criminal and putting anyone caught doing it in jail.  What the fuck is going on these days?  How is they are allowed to get away with that bullshit?  Everywhere you look some old white boy is busting his balls sideways in an effort to once again lodge the female gender amongst horses, cattle and other occasionally useful possessions.  I don’t get it.  To slightly bastardize Sting – don’t those men love their women too?

Thank Feminism

This comes courtesy of the marvelous Roxanne of Rox Populi.

If you're female and -

... you can vote, thank a feminist.

...you get paid as much as men doing the same job, thank a feminist.

...you went to college instead of being expected to quit after high school so your brothers could go because "You'll just get married anyway", thank a feminist.

...you can apply for any job, not just "women's work", thank a feminist.

...you can get or give birth control information without going to jail, thank a feminist.

...your doctor, lawyer, pastor judge or legislator is a woman, thank a feminist.

...you play an organized sport, thank a feminist.

...you can wear slacks without being excommunicated from your church or run out of town, thank a feminist.

...your boss isn't allowed to pressure you to sleep with him, thank a feminist.

...you get raped and the trial isn't about your hemline or your previous boyfriends, thank a feminist.

...you start a small business and can get a loan using only your name and credit history, thank a feminist

...you are on trial and are allowed to testify in your own defense, thank a feminist.

...you own property that is solely yours, thank a feminist.

...you have the right to your own salary even if you are married or have a male relative, thank a feminist.

...you get custody of your children following divorce or separation, thank a feminist.

...you get a voice in the raising and care of your children instead of them being completely controlled by the husband/father, thank a feminist.

...your husband beats you and it is illegal and the police stop him instead of lecturing you on better wifely behavior, thank a feminist.

...you are granted a degree after attending college instead of a certificate of completion, thank a feminist.

...you can breastfeed your baby discreetly in a public place and not be arrested, thank a feminist.

...you marry and your civil human rights do not disappear into your husband's rights, thank a feminist.

...you have the right to refuse sex with a diseased husband [or just "husband" in general], thank a feminist.

...you have the right to keep your medical records confidential from the men in your family, thank a feminist.

...you have the right to read the books you want, thank a feminist.

...you can testify in court about crimes or wrongs your husband has committed, thank a feminist.

...you can choose to be a mother or not a mother in you own time not at the dictates of a husband or rapist, thank a feminist.

...you can look forward to a lifespan of 80 years instead of dying in your 20s from unlimited childbirth, thank a feminist.

...you can see yourself as a full, adult human being instead of a minor who needs to be controlled by a man, thank a feminist.

Amen.  I grew up in the 60's and 70's - when feminism was in its infancy.  I cannot tell you how many times I was told I couldn’t do something because I was a girl.  One still chafes today.  I wanted to enter the soapbox derby when I was 10 years old.  Girls weren't allowed.  And I didn't have the kind of parent that would stand up for me.  I'll tell you what, though - this prompted me to fight like the dickens for what I wanted when I was in my teens.  In High School I wanted every chance to get into a good college, despite being poor as a church mouse.  I attended a Catholic school - girls only.  The nearby boy’s Catholic school offered up necessary college prep courses; necessary if you wanted to get into something more than just a community college, that is.  So I asked to attend and was refused.  Bad move on their part.  I created the biggest stink you've ever heard - threatened to go to the newspapers and claim discrimination if I wasn’t allowed in.  Dispensation was granted; and I paved the way for other girls to follow me.  I understand college prep courses were added to my alma mater within 5 years as a result.  I did that - and I'm proud of it.

Same kind of thing happened when I was in college.  The high paying summer job on campus was working as part of the painting crew.  The entire school was being re-painted inside and out; hard work – but highly paid hard work - and I needed the money.  I was paying my own way through college, and the tuition was a killer.  Students hired as painters got $10 bucks an hour; a veritable fortune back in 1975.  Again - I raised a huge stink - and the boys that had already been hired stood up for me.  I was the first woman ever hired on that crew.  All this because the soap box derby people were sexist assholes.  It was the 1970’s before they allowed girls to compete, as I recall.  You know – that disappointment still lingers.  When I was a kid – there was a part of me that wanted to design cars and airplanes; or build buildings and bridges.  I had an innate knack for engineering – a talent I put to good use in my chosen profession of the theatre.  I can think three-dimensionally; quite a boon when working in what was then seen as a mostly two dimensional art form.  Still – I sometimes wonder what might have happened if I’d been allowed to participate in that race.    

Time and Tide

 

It's been a very long day.

National Girlfriends Day

I am only as strong as the coffee I drink, the hairspray I use and the friends that I have!

National Girlfriends Day - nope – there isn’t one.  Yup – there should be.  You know what I mean - what would most of us do without our sisters, confidants and shopping companions, lunching and traveling girls?  You know - when I was younger - most of my friends were male.  I am of a generation that taught women to distrust each other - to assume the girl standing next to you was gonna steal something - your earrings, your man.  Just try and play 'Mystery Date' with a gaggle of competitive 10 year olds.  It can get downright nasty!  So right off the bat I said no - I up and refused to fall into that trap.  I wouldn't play the 'compete' game.  Unfortunately - most of my contemporaries played all too well.  Every time I tried to establish a relationship with a woman - that old 'distrust' monster reared its ugly head.  Until I was in college (second time around - I was 30).  Some of the women I met there were like me.  They too refused to compete.  Finally!  I had sisters!  It was a revelation - and a blessing.  I count the women in my life as precious jewels.

It was one of those women who sent me this.  My friend Brandy in Hong Kong.  She sent me this image as well.  I met Brandy at The Bottom's Up Club.  She was one of the servers.  I thought she was one of the most beautiful women I had ever seen in my entire life.  We got to talking - and we still are 22 years later.  So here's to all the wonderful women in our lives - long may they wave!

It is good to be a woman:

1. We got off the Titanic first.

2. We can scare male bosses with the mysterious gynecological disorder excuse.

3. Taxis stop for us.

4. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
5. No matter how many fashion faux pas we make – nothing could ever rival the Speedo.
6. We don't have to pass gas to amuse ourselves.
7. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
8. We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her rear end.
9. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
10. We have the ability to dress ourselves.
11. We can talk to the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
12. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we are aware that we will look like an idiot.
13. We will never regret piercing our ears.
14. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
15. We can make comments about how silly men are in their presence because they aren't listening anyway.

My beautiful friend Brandy is standing second from the right.  She teaches exotic dance.  This is from one of her performances.  Hey girl!  I'm thinking of you!

MEN!!!

We all need a little giggle now and then – and this REALLY tickled my funny bone, so I thought I’d share it with you. My friend Elaine sent me this lovely little treatise on how to deal with the man in your life.  I should point out that Elaine’s mother-in-law has temporarily moved in with them – causing her husband to hide in the basement every day until bedtime.  Said mother-in-law set the kitchen on fire last week, prompting Elaine’s hubby to go out for a long drive, only to come home and promptly ask what’s for dinner.  My suggestion was asshole under glass, but she let that one pass.

Don't EVEN Get Me Started!!

This was just sent to me by my friend Amy; a compassionate soul who truly understands.  Bless you, my child - I really needed the giggle.

Question: How many women with MENOPAUSE (or PMS) does it take to change a light bulb?

Answer: One! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out.  And, once they figured it out, they wouldn’t be able to find the MOTHERFUCKING light bulbs despite the fact that they’ve been in the SAME CABINET for the past 17 years!  But if they did, by some MIRACLE OF GOD, actually find them 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!!  And underneath it would be the wrapper the fucking light bulbs came in!!!!!  Because no one ever carries out the garbage!!!!!!  It’s a wonder we haven’t all SUFFOCATED from the piles of garbage that are a FOOT DEEP throughout the entire house!!  It would take an army to clean this place!  And don’t EVEN get me started on who changes the toilet paper roll!!!!!!

I’m sorry – WHAT was the question?   

Gender & Blogging

Just what is the equivalence of a pat on the head complete with lollipop?  Is it the left-handed compliment – ‘well, pretty good, considering you don’t focus solely on politics’.  ‘What a nice little blog!’  ‘There’s always room for your sort of thing.’  ‘I’m sure some people will find the information useful.’  Makes you wish they’d not bothered in the first, place, doesn’t it?  Make my lollipop cherry, please. Or is it more of a ‘seen but not heard’ kind of thing?  ‘If we ignore her long enough, maybe she’ll just go away – we don’t have enough marshmallows to go around, you see.’  ‘She can’t play – she’s a girl!’  ‘Da da da da da da da da da da da – (has she gone yet?) da da da da da da (OK – it’s safe to take your fingers out of your ears, guys – she shut up’).

Maxine's Living Will

This is Maxine.  Trust me - you really don't want to fuck with her.  I came across this wonderful little document some time back, and have been saving it for the proverbial rainy day.  Well - we had a very wet weekend!  Enjoy.

Just Spread 'Em Honey!

Been keeping up with the revolution, sisters?  No?  Thought all that bullshit was over and done with and you didn't have to contribute?  Girls!!!  Don't tell me you actually thought you could stand on the shoulders of us old broads and it would be enough to keep your mascara dry?  Au contraire, my dears!  So sorry!  Putting old Susie B. on a coin almost a dozen years back just didn't cut it.  You might have to get offa that pretty little ass and punt after all.  Huh?  Still no ringy-dingy?  The Fat Lady's cheese has slipped off its collective cracker?  Crikey!  Let's try this one again.  Been watching any MTV lately?  Strrrike!  All right - how's about --- listened to your daughter's boyfriend in the last 10 days?  Still a wash?  Good god - talk about having the native intelligence of a medium-sized eggplant!  OK - it seems you have selected curtain number three - blind, deaf and dumb!  Don't take this personally, but you really need to add fish to your diet.